How Yoga Has Changed How I Run

When I started training for my first Half Marathon (under the tutelage of Team To End AIDS; AIDS Project Los Angeles. http://www.apla.org/) it never occurred to me that it would be my mind, not my body, that would be my biggest obstacle during my training and on race day.  As it turns out, my mental strength was/is way weaker than I ever knew it to be or, until now, cared to admit out loud. When one who doesn't run hears "Half Marathon", they immediately think (at least I did) "my body could never run 13.1 miles!". Well, newsflash, it CAN....if your brain doesn't get in the way, that is! I'm not saying that the physical challenges (fatigue, muscle cramping, etc) won't try to break you down, because trust me, they will. What I'm saying is that our bodies can endure way more than we think possible, and once we push past "the walls", you will find you CAN go on, and endure. 

Mentally though, it's a bit more difficult than just pushing past the pain. Imagine running, and having every part of your body screaming at you to stop, then add to that the "Dark Voice" (what I call the part of my brain that tries to bring me down). It's saying, on an unforgiving endless loop, "You're so tired, you should really stop", "Go ahead and walk for a bit, it's OK", "You still have 3 miles left, there's no way you'll make it", "Feel that cramping in you calves, yeah, it's not going away" and my personal favorite "There's no way you can do this, you should just quit". On any long run over 8 miles, I felt as if I was just having a mental fight with myself. Sometimes I won, sometimes I didn't. When you run, you are alone with your thoughts, your fears, your doubt. I run alone, so I don't have anyone there pushing me forward, giving me words of encouragement. My "Happy Voice" is loud, strong and very present when I'm feeling great, however, as soon as any sign of weakness comes my "Dark Voice" swoops in and knocks out "Happy Voice". 

As I began to train, and run, more and more Half Marathons, I started to ask myself "Why do you torture yourself? Can't you just enjoy the run?". Well, I do have many runs that I enjoy, and when I finish them I feel elated, accomplished, strong and honestly, invincible. Unfortunately, most of those runs are 7 miles or shorter. I began to wonder how I could transfer my "runner's high" to my long runs. I tried many different things, and found slight improvement, but nothing that could conquer the "Dark Voice". I'm VERY proud to say that no matter how difficult (and trust me, I've had some shitty, shitty and really painful race days) I finished all 8 of my Half Marathons I trained for. I'm not happy with some of my finish times, but I didn't quit. I endured. 

After my last race, the OC Half Marathon, May of '12, I felt a bit burnt out. I did a few short runs afterwards, but just wasn't feeling it. I decided to take a little break to "regroup", and let my body recover. It was at this time, that I began to practice yoga 4-5 times a week, as opposed to 1-2 times a week. This would turn out to be a decision that would change my mind, body and soul and in turn, the way I ran.

I was aware of the physical changes that my disciplined practice brought me but until just recently, when I began training for my 9th Half Marathon, did I realize the MENTAL transformation that stemmed from my practice. The first couple weeks of my training were rough, physically. I was in great shape, but due to not running for about 9 months my body was like "What the hell are you doing to me?!?!?". As I immersed myself into my training, and began to climb in my mileage, I could feel myself physically getting stronger every single run. At first, I thought it was just because the mileage was fairly low, however, as I began to have my LSD (long slow distance) runs, I felt like a different runner. I was actually enjoying myself, keeping exact with my 6:1 interval (which I had problems with during all my other training runs/races), and cheering myself on silently in my head! I'm not saying my runs have been pain-free, but never did I think about slowing down or walking outside of my minute walk interval. I don't know that I'm physically stronger now, but I know that I am mentally stronger.

In yoga, I primarily practice Vinyasa Flow (Iyengar based), you are asked to be at one with yourself. To calm the mind and be PRESENT in the moment. If you are struggling, recognize it, be OK with it, breathe through it, and come out stronger. You are not in a competition; not with others, not with yourself. If you are there, on the mat, practicing, you have accomplished something. I now realize now that these ideals have become part of me, and while running, instead of thinking of how many miles I have left, I was thinking of how many I have run so far. I took every 6:1 interval as a small accomplishment and thought, "Well, I can do that again", instead of thinking "I have to do that 13 more times before I am done, ugh". I used to be glued to my watch, tracking my pace like a crazy person, and if I was off by any amount I would berate myself about how slow I was. I honestly have let that go. I am slow, but the percent of people in the world who have run a Half Marathon is around 5%, and I am honored and PROUD to be part of that group of individuals! I may be slow (my PR on a race is 2:36:01), but I have FINISHED 8 Halfs, and I am ready to conquer my 9th in a few short weeks! How many people can say that?

In closing, yoga has done more for me than I can write in one entry. I thought it would help my running by lengthening out the muscle groups that tend to shorten for runners, and help with my recovery during training, but I never thought it would help with my self-doubt, confidence and my defeatist attitude. Once again yoga, you have blown my mind with your healing powers. I can't guarantee that this upcoming race will be my best but what I can guarantee is that it will be my most enjoyable (pain and all) and I will end with my head held high, no matter the outcome. It's the journey that counts, not the destination......

I'd love to hear YOUR experiences as a runner. Does any of this resonate with you? Any tricks/tips that work for you? 

Remember to step back, take a deep breath and enjoy the ride!
NAMASTE

A glimpse into my crazy life

 Hi everyone! 

  First of all, thank you for visiting my blog! I've been creating this for quite some time, and am so happy to be writing my first post. I hope to inspire, as well as draw inspiration from all of you, so PLEASE write your feedback so we can get some discussions going. I am a teacher of many things, but LOVE being a student. I love learning from others, so bring it on!
  This blog will cover many things, so I know there will be something interesting for all of you. In addition to dance, yoga, running and fitness, I have a deep passion for cooking and baking (Ummmmm, and eating!!!) I will be sharing my nutrition tips, recipes and yummy places to go and get your grub on! 
  I will be following up shortly with my first entry, which I'm working on now "How yoga has changed the way I run". I would love to see some followers, so if you know anyone who would be interested in my blog, send it on to them. It would be much appreciated!
  Thanks for taking the time to read my words. I hope your day is beautiful, and filled with the things you love most. 

Remember to step back, take a deep breath, and enjoy the ride.